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Why Do We Always Default to 'He' When We Speak?

2025-08-13

Why Do We Always Default to 'He' When We Speak?

Have you ever had the feeling that the world wasn't quite made for you?

Imagine, for a moment, that you're left-handed, but all the scissors, desks, can openers, and even computer mice in the world were designed for right-handers. You could certainly use them, but it would always feel a bit awkward and unwieldy. You'd feel like an "exception," constantly needing to adapt to a "default" rule.

In a way, the language we use every day is much like this world designed for right-handers.

It has an invisible "default setting."


Language's "Factory Settings" Are a Bit Outdated

Think about it: When we mention words like "doctor," "lawyer," "writer," or "programmer," what's the first image that comes to mind? Male or female?

Most of the time, we default to a male image. If it's a woman, we often feel the need to specifically add a qualifier, like "female doctor" or "female programmer."

Conversely, we rarely say "male nurse" or "male secretary" because, in those fields, the default image has shifted to female.

Why is this the case?

This isn't some conspiracy; it's simply because our language is an extremely ancient system. Its "factory settings" were established hundreds, even thousands, of years ago. In those eras, social roles were very clearly defined, with most public roles occupied by men. Consequently, language set "male" as the "default option" for describing human professions and identities.

"He" not only refers to males but is also often used to designate a person of unspecified gender. It's as if, within the system, person = he. Meanwhile, "she" has become "Option B," requiring special notation.

This is much like those scissors designed only for right-handers: it's not a deliberate exclusion, but it certainly makes the other half feel "non-mainstream" and "in need of explicit clarification."

Language Doesn't Just Describe the World—It Shapes It

You might say, "It's just a habit. Is it really that important?"

It's very important. Language isn't just a tool for communication; it subtly shapes our way of thinking. The words we use determine what kind of world we can perceive.

If, in our language, words representing strength, wisdom, and authority always default to male connotations, then we will subconsciously associate these qualities more with men. Women's achievements and presence will become blurred, even "invisible."

It's like an outdated city map that only shows a few main thoroughfares from decades ago. You could certainly find your way with it, but all the newly built neighborhoods, subway lines, and charming hidden streets would be invisible to you.

Our world has changed dramatically. Women, just like men, are excelling in every profession. Our social identities are far richer than simply "he" or "she." Yet our language, this "map," has updated far too slowly.

Giving Our Language a "System Upgrade"

So what should we do? We can't just discard language and start from scratch, can we?

Of course not. We don't need to abandon the entire city; we just need to update that old map.

Just as we've started designing specialized scissors and tools for left-handers, we can also consciously "upgrade" our linguistic tools to make them more precise, more inclusive, and better able to reflect the real world.

1. Make the "invisible" visible. When you know someone is female, feel free to use terms like "actress," "woman CEO," or "female founder." This isn't about creating a special category; it's about acknowledging and celebrating the fact that, yes, they are present and significant in these roles.

2. Use more inclusive language. When gender is uncertain, or you want to encompass everyone, use more neutral terms. For instance, use "everyone" or "folks" instead of "gentlemen," and "firefighter" or "healthcare worker" to describe a group.

This isn't about "political correctness"; it's about "precision." It's like upgrading a phone's operating system from iOS 10 to iOS 17 – not to be trendy, but to make it more user-friendly, more powerful, and able to keep up with the times.

Every time we choose a more inclusive word, we are adding new details to our mental "map," making previously overlooked corners clearly visible.

Beyond Language: Seeing a Larger World

When we turn our gaze from our immediate surroundings to the wider world, this linguistic "upgrade" becomes even more crucial.

When communicating with people from different cultural backgrounds, we're not just translating words; we're crossing the boundaries of thought. You'll discover that different languages harbor entirely different "default settings" and ways of perceiving the world.

To truly understand others, relying solely on word-for-word translation is far from enough. We need a tool that genuinely understands culture and context, helping us break down barriers and build authentic connections.

This is precisely the significance of a tool like Intent. It's not just a chat app; its AI translation feature can help you understand the subtle cultural nuances behind language, allowing you to have deep, meaningful conversations with anyone from any corner of the world.

Ultimately, whether we're upgrading our own native language or crossing borders to understand another, what we seek is the same thing:

To gain a broader perspective and see a more authentic, more complete world.

And all of this can begin with changing just one word we utter.

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